Misnomer

The nuns at the orphanage had christened him Désiré. What a misnomer for an abandoned child. They had told him they picked this name because even if his genitors had rejected him, God had desired him to be alive. What a load of bollocks. It had not taken him long to realise there was no such thing as a God. At the age of 5, as he was playing Chinese checkers on his own on Christmas day, spinning the board with his hands covered with mince pie to play the next turn, it dawned on him: there was no God. He just knew. Nothing in particular had triggered the thought. It was his own call to Faith. He remembered walking to the green blackboard at the back of the playroom and writing: there is no god. And today, as his crying wife wouldn't let go of the body of their stillborn child, he believed it more than ever: there is no god.

Hélène L.

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I would like to argue – no, wait. That would be impolite – I would like to put forward that it is a complete misnomer to say Canadians are irenic negotiators. We can do bad stuff too! We have an Army and we’re not afraid – what? They’ve all been replaced by Peace Keepers? Are you sure? – I still think it’s a misnomer. All in favour of continuing the debate over a large box of Timbits say ‘Eh?’

Kelli B.